I do enjoy a good guilty pleasure read loaded with rich and famous characters who indulge in a decadent lifestyle. However, that doesn’t mean I enjoy a guilty pleasure read if it’s not actually GOOD.
Unfortunately, Stalk Me by Jillian Dodd is not good by any stretch of the imagination. How in the hell it has a 4 star rating on Goodreads is beyond me.
First off, so you know what Stalk Me is about, it’s one of those books where the MC is filthy stinking rich and is pretty much Paris Hilton’s long lost twin. Her name is Keatyn, she’s this hot blond bombshell who’s parents are at the tip top of A list movie stars.
You’d think from the title (you know, Stalk Me?) that the plot would revolve around a stalker and…I don’t know, stalker incidents and danger? Oh, no, get that thought right out of your pretty little head. Stalk Me centers around Keatyn’s inability to decide whether or not her pretty little perfect life is going exactly according to plan, her parents allowing her to do whatever she wants, even have romantic dinners with significantly older men who (at least in my state) would be arrested if they paid attention to her advances. Then again, in the real world the stalker would have….wait, I’ll touch on that later. Anyway, Stalk Me centers around Keatyn’s sex life, her adventures across Europe, her inability to make up her damned mind, and basically…a bunch of trivial crap that is so redundant and ridiculous that if I hadn’t paid a dollar for the stupid book, I would have abandoned it.
The characters in Stalk Me are barely one dimensional, they have no depth, no meaning to their lives other than surfing and sex, and obviously no one is truly concerned with an older man stalking propositioning, and kidnapping a teenager in this world. In fact, when all of the above happens, they don’t arrest this man, they pretty much brush aside any testimony that Keatyn attempts to give (sorry, Dodd, I don’t buy that they even took her statement, even though you claim otherwise) and then send, this perfect celebrity, into witness protection at a boarding school. Um, SAY WHAT? I don’t think Paris Hilton could hide out in a boarding school…and apparently Keatyn is the same calibre, if not more famous, that Paris Hilton. Geez, reality much? Oh, and don’t forget that Keatyn can only stay in touch with one of her little boyfriends, not both, because apparently the stalker will attack one, but the other is safe. I can’t even explain how hard I rolled my eyes at that. The plot itself? I’ll be honest, one of my 3 year old students could come up with a more original, better executed plot than this nonsense. I’m serious, it’s that bad.
Basically, if you have half a brain and aren’t a celeb obsessed thirteen year old (the only people I think could take this book seriously are preteens, and it certainly is NOT YA appropriate by any means), avoid this book like the plague. It’s just horrible.